Clearly, I have issues with poetry magnets.
There are never enough articles included with the word sets. Since it’s difficult to write without using a, an, or the, I am forced to lean heavily on adjectives during refrigerator-sonnet endeavors.
Inherent limitations of the magnetic medium present a compelling literary challenge. Since “flowing purple tigers caress my beautiful soul” is hardly Plath or Poe, rectangular rhymes limit opportunities for authentic creative expression. Instead of incisive prose or delicate metaphors, I’d rather construct salacious stanzas and ribald rhymes. Envisioning your grandmother happening upon an “enormous juicy man meat sandwich” fills me with glee.
When I made the decision to purchase my own refrigerator verse kit, I erred in my choice of poetic vernacular. I nullified the challenge of transforming innocence into innuendo by purchasing the smutty magnet set. Thus, the above masterpiece, which might be low-brow enough to make Beavis and Butthead blush.
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